The Calvinator » August 2004 Journal Entries » AboutMyBaby - online baby scrapbooks, photo albums, videos, birth and pregnancy announcements

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Fri, Aug 27, 2004 8:25 AM
It's simply astonishing how a $5 hunk of plastic in the shape of a child's lawnmower can be likened to an ounce of crack as far as addiction is concerned.

The Lawnmower to Calvin is like a drug and Calvin is so addicted, we've made reservations at the Baby Betty Ford Clinic starting tomorrow (it is my understanding that the first few days are the hardest).

We realized Calvin had hit rock bottom when, while taking him to daycare yesterday morning, prying the lawnmower from his freakishly strong fingers resulted in a meltdown that set off the terrorist sirens. Government officials were not amused.

Thank you, Mom, for the Baby Crack.

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Mon, Aug 23, 2004 10:42 AM
Aftershock

We are currently going through what we affectionately refer to as, "Aftershock". Otherwise known as "Post-Grandma Syndrome".

After a WHOLE WEEK with Grandma and Josh and plenty of spoiling and forbidden treats and lots of walks and ice cream and did I mention the spoiling?, Calvin has been forced to return to life sans Grandma and Josh. A life void of rules (except hitting, there is no hitting), a life where bedtimes once again exist.

Calvin is boding well, but he misses Grandma and Josh a lot. So do Mom & Dad. Now we have to change diapers again! Horrors! Let's face it, it's a lot better with Grandma here. Because even though The Grandma Syndrome is greatly dreaded, the Post-Grandma Syndrom Aftershock is much, much worse. Normal life sucks!

Calvin is adjusting, but it will be awhile before we're all back to normal. In the meantime, Calvin has added the entire "Annie" songbook to his vocabulary. Most specifically, "It's A Hard Knock Life".

Until we see Grandma again, anyway.

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Mon, Aug 16, 2004 7:00 PM
Grandma Linda is spending the week with us, which means that Calvin is suffering from a severe case of The Grandma Syndrome.

Side effects include, but are not limited to:

Excessive whininess when being held by ANYONE except Grandma.

Excessive whininess when Grandma is not in direct line of vision.

Excessive whininess when ANYONE other than Grandma attempts to feed him.

45% increase in temper tantrums in the absence of Grandma.

68% increase in parental grumpiness.

25% increase in spoiled-rottenness.

And Grandma is loving every. single. second. of it and already counting down the days until next year.

Joep & I are looking into tranquilizers.

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Wed, Aug 11, 2004 1:30 PM
PRAISE JEEBUS, Calvin is FINALLY starting to say actual WORDS!

Even though we'd anticipated a slight delay in speech development when we decided to raise Calvin in a bilingual environment, we never expected a delay of SEVERAL MONTHS.

(Thanks, Calvin, like I needed something else to worry about.)

Besides the entire Gettysburg Address, Calvin's vocabulary now consists of, "ball", "dog" and "uh-oh!"

Now I know you might be thinking how miffed the girls probably are that Calvin's vocabulary doesn't include, "cat" or "kitty", but let me assure you, they couldn't care less. In fact, the less they have to do with Calvin, the happier they are (as long as we continue to rescue them from the Wrath of Calvin).

Grandma Linda, upon learning that Calvin's vocal chords do in fact work, gently reminded us that he should be saying "Grandma" clearly by the time she gets here on Friday. Or we will be completely written out of the will.

AND THEN WHERE WILL WE GET PENNIES AND RECYCLABLES?!

So Calvin, repeat after me: GRAN-MA. GRAN-MA. GRAMMA.

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